Answer to the Most Absurd Question

"Why is a good lookin' person like you still single?"

Why indeed.  That's not something I will tell someone using this as a pick up line.

It's something I tell people to be a warning against opening yourself up to the wrong people.  People who can sense that you were a kind and trusting person.  People who could sense that you had a notion that every man wants to be Prince Charming and a gentleman.  People who take advantage of your sweetness for their own gain, whether for academic, physical, or emotional reasons.

It's something that has made me who I am.  Something that helped me create the standards I use when meeting men.  Something that nags in the back of my mind that there is a strong possibility that I will live my life alone, with my cats and my music.

It's something I use to keep myself safe from heartbreak.  When the person you give a chance in high school to  sleeps with your best friend, after telling you that he wanted to date you for 2 1/2 years.  When you date the guy who gives you your first kiss, and he is too embarrassed to tell his parents he's dating you.  When you think that you find someone in college, and he just wants to use you for your body and tells you that he only said he loved you to get in your pants.  When a guy chooses to woo you with kindness just to be able to hook up with another girl from the sorority, and you find out that he has done this with many of your sisters.  When a guy tells you that his biggest regret in high school was not asking you out, then keeping you on a figurative fishing line for a year and a half just so he can feel power.

I'm still single because I'm scared.  As you can see, my track record has bee full of "Real Winners" (Note MAJOR Sarcasm).  I have had so many of these men in my life that I have become jaded.  I need someone to show me that my standards for men are reasonable.  I need to be shown that there are real, honest, and kind gentlemen in our world, and not just available in the "Extremely Attractive, British, Actor" model.

It's almost insulting when I get asked that question, like it's my fault I'm single.  It's my choice, based on past experience, to not settle for mediocre, because when I do settle for mediocre, it doesn't end well.

So never ask that to a woman, unless you want to know her past heartaches and heartbreaks.  And be warned, if you do ask that, prepare to be depressed afterwards.

So sorry that this post isn't witty and funny, but sometimes honesty is better than humor.  More necessary sometimes.